Beating Negativity with a Heart of Thanksgiving
I’ve been avoiding this blog at all costs because all I want to write about my health is how tired I am. But it’s not just the fatigue that is killing me, it’s the frustration that I am doing so many things well in my health and life, but I am still so stinkin’ tired.
The truth is, being pregnant took a lot out of me. Then having the baby took a lot more out of me. Then nursing takes a lot out of me. Now just having a very mobile 7-month-old (who is almost walking – seriously, she took an unassisted step this weekend), I am realizing takes a lot out of me. And the ultimate truth is that life takes a lot out of me – I need a slower pace in life, and I’m not able to get that right now.
I’m staring down my life as it is and thinking, “Can my body handle this?”
Of course, the real answer is that it can, and it will. But when waves of fatigue hit me throughout the day, and I dream of when I can go back to sleep again, I wonder.
The hardest part is not the fatigue – it’s keeping a positive outlook despite the fatigue. I’m sure anyone with a chronic illness will say the same – having a positive attitude is half the battle of fighting anything that is out of balance in our bodies. When we are able to look at life positively, despite the way that we feel, we’re given the sense that we can tackle anything – because we can!
So now the question I ask is where do I find this positive attitude? Certainly it’s a product of a grateful heart – a continuous spirit of thanksgiving. It’s so easy to focus on the hard things in life because we’re trying to overcome them – but when we focus on the good things, it seems all the hard stuff just kind of works itself right out or at least becomes less of a focus.
Here’s a list of 10 things I’m thankful for today:
1. My husband, who despite needing to go to work, stuck around for a few more minutes this morning to help with a very active baby.
2. My baby, of course. She’s a complete joy (though she is proceeding to scream in her crib right now as she refuses to sleep…but still…I love her) and she makes me giggle all day long.
3. A house to live in – seriously, with the rain and the cool weather, I am thankful for my haven.
4. Good food to eat. (see #5)
5. Farm pick-up today! My farm share comes today, and I am so thankful for the fresh, local food.
6. Coffee. Okay, I know I’m a health counselor, and I am not supposed to have this on my list. But mid-morning, when I need some comfort, I love my coffee right.
7. Living near my parents. Even though they are out of the country right now, I love being close to them and being able to call or just stop by – especially when my days feel very long. Oh, and they have an espresso machine (see #6).
8. That even when I feel I’ve been by myself for what seems like ages, I know I am never alone and have the spirit of God walking me through the day – caring about what I do as a mother and a woman and guiding me as I figure all this out.
9. Summer walks.
10. Hemp pants.
What are you thankful for today?